The Art of Non-Conformity

When you were a kid and wanted to do something your parents or teachers didn't like, you may have heard the question, "If everyone else jumped off a bridge, would you?" The idea is that it's not good to do something stupid, even if everybody else is doing it. The logic is, Think for yourself instead of following the crowd.

Its not bad advice, even if its sometimes used to exert power rather than to support independent thinking. But one day, you grow up and suddenly the tables are turned. People start thinking you have to behave very much like they do. If you disagree and don't conform to their expectations, some of them get confused or irritated Its almost like they are asking, "Hey, everyone else is jumping off the bridge. Why aren't you?"

I wrote this to bring about a childhood message to adult application. Screw those people jumping off the bridge. Make your own decisions. Live your own life.

Asking "why?" to everything like a three-year-old is helpful in making sure you don't jump off the bridge without at least considering the alternatives. Whenever you find yourself confronted by a request, obligation, r expectation you don't like, it helps to look carefully for the motivations and rationale behind what you hear.

When you ask and the answer comes back "because thats what your supposed to do," you know you're looking out over the bridge again. In the average day, you'll confront this reality many times- in work, relationships, and in the countless decisions and choices you are required to make. The presence of the bridge and the expectations of other people are somewhat unavoidable. whether you jump or not, however, is entirely up to you.

Even if the people giving it to you weren't that great at following it themselves, the counsel you may have received at a young age is correct. Why jump off the bridge just because everyone else is doing it? You can step back from the ledge, turn around, and walk away into new adventures that had preciously been only fleeting ideas. You can also help others to walk away from the bridge, or you can rewrite the rules that brought you to the bridge in the first place. The possibilities are unlimited but it all begins with the deliberate choice to think differently.